Yes.

I was never a “kid person” growing up. I didn’t relate to children and didn’t have much experience with them, but I always saw having a family as the natural path in life. Just like dating leads to marriage, I saw kids as the next chapter after marriage. When I really think about why I wanted kids, it comes down to two main reasons.

First, the experience itself seemed undeniably compelling. I’m introverted and not naturally a risk-taker, but I’ve learned over time that it’s important to challenge yourself and embrace growth. The last thing I want is a life that feels stagnant or boring. Skipping out on something as profound as raising kids felt like missing out on a major part of life.

Second, my wife is incredible. The idea of taking on the adventure of parenting with her felt both exciting and deeply meaningful. It’s intimate, difficult, fun, scary, and rewarding — and I couldn’t imagine a better partner to share that with.

Now, fast-forward to the present: we have three teenagers, and we’ve genuinely loved raising them. I’m not looking forward to the quiet days after they head off to college — the energy and fullness of having kids around has been one of the best parts of our lives and I’ll miss it when they’ve gone on to start their own independent lives.

Wait - is she his ex, or are you married to both of them? If you are all one family, I do understand, that sort of makes sense not to make 3 more and end up with a family of 9 people.

If she is his ex, what the actual fuck?

43 male, have 3 kids. They’re a ton of work but they’re also incredibly rewarding. The house is full of love and joy constantly. I can’t imagine life without them (and my wife) and I wouldn’t want to live in it if they were no longer here. That’s how much of an impact they have on you.

That’s said, totally respect you not wanting them. They’re one of the biggest sacrifices and commitments.

No but mine is 23 and I feel it’s too late to tell her.

I grew up in a cult where the expectation was that I’d get married and have multiple children. Luckily my own parents somehow managed to raise me right in spite of the indoctrination, and when I went to college I realized both that I could choose and that I didn’t want kids.

After my partner and I had been together for 15 years or so, we started seriously rethinking being child free. It was something we decided to do together. My kid is now about to turn 9. I adore him and love spending time with him. I still don’t much like other children and I never considered going through pregnancy again. My partner and I have talked about potentially fostering or adopting if we manage to retire early, but I’m content either way.

It is abusive to bring children into the world as it is now.

Either we make a better place for them, or give them the peace of never having being born.

No. Not even close to financially stable as a college student in his mid-20s.

Also, if I did want kids, I think I’d rather adopt than bring a child into a world that is dying and end up not being able to ensure they have a future that doesn’t end in apocalypse.

Im 36 years old. No I dont want them. I would never wish a life to experience this economic selfish and greedy system.

Average salary in the United States is 40,000. People are paying over 60% of their income on housing. Prices for everyday goods continue to rise and the commitments to protecting the Earth aren’t taken seriously.

Weather continues to be more extreme and oddly behaving. Corruption increases in politics and technology is being developed without ethics in mind.

No way in hell I subject my children to any of that. Plus my husband and I have both mental illness in our families and suffer from depression from time to time. I never wanted to be here and neither did my husband. We wish everyday we didnt have to exist here. We love each other and our families, but this experience on Earth is not it.

I didn’t want kids for the entirety of my twenties. I’ve been with my partner since we were 21 and she wasn’t keen on kids for that whole period either. We got married at 30 and it wasn’t long before we both felt like kids was something we wanted.

She is currently 35 weeks pregnant and we are both super excited about the impending birth of our daughter.

We have the occasional “Oh shit! What have we done.” But mostly we can’t wait to watch her grow and teach her about the world and do exciting things with her.

We know it’s going to be a huge change but we are very stable in our lives and the time is right for it. We are both really good at supporting each other by now so we know we can cope with change together.

With what I’ve learned about humanity and reality over the years, I’ve only become more sure the right move is to never bring another life into this mortal hellscape only to be obliterated at the end. I have the desire, but I deny my own selfishness.

No

I think if you truly understand the current situation in the world we live in, economicly, socially, and environmentally, it is an extremely selfish act to create more human life.

That being said if I can ever escape poverty and have the extra money i would love to adopt

I’m a childfree woman. I am being sterilized in less than 2 weeks. I have a very very long list of reasons I don’t want kids. I won’t bore anyone by typing them out.

What I find most interesting in this thread is how people have so much of an option on other people’s choices still. It’s 2025, can we just let each other live?

No, it is not immoral to have kids. The world has always been messed up and it will continue to be until we all die out. Maybe that will happen in the next generation, maybe it won’t happen for another 50 generations. We cannot know either way.

No, it is not immoral to not have kids. You do not have a responsibility to continue your bloodline or some nonsense. You can still be invested in the future even if you don’t personally have kids.

I wish everyone had put their gender in their replies though. As a general rule, I often see more childfree women than men. I think this is because women are often put in that caregiver role earlier than men and they see how hard it is. Also women have to do the pregnancy/birth part and that seems awful. Men think of the time they’ll have to teach and play with their kids, women imagine having to cook a nutritious meal every night or get called negligent. Of course that’s not always the dynamic but you have to acknowledge it swings that way.

In a perfect utopian world, I’d like the idea of having children and raise it with a loving partner. In this dystopian world where I’m dealing with severe depression, I can barely take care of my cat, and I have trouble wanting to go outside, and the world is collapsing into a climate catastrophe, I don’t have that strong of a will to even live, let alone raise a child to even enjoy a better childhood thann what I had.

I’ve already lost my childhood due to abusive parents, I don’t really want to lose my adulthood either, so… sorry to the “soul” out there who would’ve been incarnated as my child, but honesly you wouldn’t have missed much, maybe go reincarnate on another planet that has passed the great filter.

I mean unless we magically get a fix that solves the authoritarianism in my country and my depression is also fixed. And I have good income, then, only then, maybe I’ll rethink it.

No.

1. I don’t like responsibility because I take it really seriously.

2. I try to minimize the must-do things after work.

3. Perhaps most important I generally don’t feel any compelling reason to have any.

I don’t think the request is valid.

And I do! Hopefully soon, God willing. And why? I need someone to hear me yap about morals and competent screenwriting, my wife wants someone to dress up and pour her love into. Usual reasons, I guess. 😅