I stopped listening to it because I made the “mistake” of dedicating it to my then girlfriend. I had always wanted to dedicate the song to someone, it never crossed my mind that things would not end well. When we broke up I deleted the song from my playlist and regretfully stopped listening to it, the memories it was associated with were too painful.
Recently I am trying to reconnect with the song. The memories are still there, but now they are warm and bearable, melancholic but sweet.
I wouldn’t say I loved the weekend but I can’t listen to any of his music anymore because it’s all associated with my worst ex in my head. I bought her his first album. We went to a concert of his together.
Hard to vibe with music when all it does is bring up memories of verbal, physical and psychological abuse. She hit me with her car once because I was begging her not to drive off drunk and angry. She started physically assaulting me and when I pinned her down and called the cops they threw ME in handcuffs the moment they got there (thankfully my landlord at the time backed me up that she was the aggressor). She falsely accused me of rape and would have ruined my entire life had her friend not sent me the evidence that she was just making it all up to get back at me.
Sarah I hope you’re sober now and doing better, but fuck you for everything you put me through.
Shit dude, too bad you went through all that, luckily it’s in the past. I hope you are in a better situation now and maybe you have found or will find someone who really treats you as you deserve.
Eh. Not really. I haven’t been able to trust anyone since. I’ve been in and out of FWB situations, but I make it clear with the women that I am not able to give them anything more from the start and eventually they all start falling for me and I have to end things. Just happened again for the umpteenth time a few weeks ago.
I’ve done therapy and meditation and drugs and whatever else you can think of. I already had very limited trust with people before her, but after that relationship I just cannot give anyone the emotional depth and/or trust they deserve in a loving relationship so I’ve just kinda accepted that I’m gonna die alone. I’ll probably get a dog or three one day when I live somewhere that allows them. It is what it is.