if you believe the only reason your partner isn’t cheating is that you’d find out via location share; what the fuck is the point?
There’s always gps spoofing via debug mode too. So it’s not like sharing gps is even reliable
If you have to use these things in a relationship, then you already have a problem.
This is the correct take.
I can’t believe the number of people in here with paranoia and shitty relationships that can’t communicate with their “partner”
My wife only asked me to ‘follow’ her with location sharing because there was a creepy dude in the area who was approaching women. Otherwise we trust each other enough and actually communicate about the things we do. Plus we don’t cheat on each other - there’s enough stress in life without adding to it lol.
RIGHT??? Jesus Christ people… Get some therapy
If this was demanded of me, I would end the relationship immediately. That’s absolutely not worth it.
And what if you broke your leg and were lying in a ditch while chipmunks were eating your spleen, eh? How would anyone ever find you huh? Bet the egg is really on your face now!
Well then that’s just too bad for me, isn’t it?
Obviously I have my phone on me so I could just dial 911. If your phone breaks when whatever occurs to you, then your spouse or whatever isn’t going to be able to track your location and you’re not going to be able to call 911 either. So either way you’re fucked.
But what if a T-Rex swats your phone away but gets distracted trying to pick it up with his tiny arms, and forgets to eat you, huh? Bet you didn’t consider that likely scenario eh Buster Brown?
i’d get those chipmunks some cheese.
Immature crap like this makes me very grateful to be a grownup married to a grownup.
Isn’t it strange that “trusting” someone now, means letting them constantly spy on you?
I talked to some late teens about it some months ago. They see it as an “I give you permission to see my every move” kind of thing, as in they have nothing to hide. And they do it pretty early on in relationships, as a show of commitment.
I got my SO to turn off location tracking on Snapchat because I got a message from a family member about his location. She had screenshotted his location from the snap map, searched the address, found the person living there, searched him up, found out he’s also gay, and wondered if I knew he was out with another man?! FYI we attended a dinner party at the guys home.
That’s the level of insane some people get. Constant surveillance, mixed with insecurities and stories of cheating, and you’ve got a shitty ass cocktail.
Me having location shared with my partner of 20 years is one thing. But sharing it with anyone else? Fuck no.
I wouldn’t even share my location with my SO of 10+ years. Why? They don’t need it, and there’s tons of potential negative things with that (phone manufacturer sells it, gov’t takes it w/ backdoor deals, breach reveals it, etc).
I don’t want my SO’s location information, and they shouldn’t want mine. If I’m doing some high risk activity, like doing a long hike alone, sure, but it’s going off immediately after.
My partner and I used to use location sharing pretty much 100% of the time. We just felt better knowing we could find each other.
But today, we do not, because the trust is shattered.
Google just cannot be trusted with our locations.
Home Assistant
Seconded.
And having each other’s location is really helpful. I’m nervous if my partner doesn’t know where I am.
Yeah my wife has MS and I worry when shes late that she is having trouble. And I go hiking in the bush so its good if she has my approximate location
they still have it… if your using an android phone at least… and your cell provider…
There are options that don’t use Google et al.
So you have suggestions?
It’s not something I’ve used very much as I don’t have much need for it, but I have used Locus a few times and I’m pretty comfortable with their privacy policy compared to the vast majority of other options.
You are still sharing it with google if you have an android phone lol
And you don’t think iPhones and Apple don’t know your location?
When did I ever say that? Why would you just assume that since I said google is tracking your location I just being using an iPhone and thibk that apple is better? Fuck apple and google they both suck. Dont use either of them.
We use a self hosted reitti instance instead now
My wife and I have location sharing enabled in case something happens to one of us. We usually don’t use it, but its good to have when we need to meet up at an unfamiliar place after something goes sideways for one of us.
But if your SO doesn’t trust you enough to allow you private moments and would accuse you of cheating, your relationship isn’t based on trust and thus is very weak.
Jesus fuck, what did people do with their spouses and kids before phones? Trust them?
Sounds unlikely.
private investigators
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If your partner cant trust you not to cheat then work on your relasionship or end it. Dont do this shit.
My wife always has my location. I regularly go out for hours on my motorcycle and I’ll tell her I’m going for a hour ride and get lost in the woods for 3. Years ago I had to call her to pick me up after a truck decided to go left in front of me and shattered my arm into 4 pieces. Caller her from the hospital bed high as fuck on morphine. She has my location so if I stop responding for hours she can make sure I didn’t wind up in a medical center LOL.
That is entirely different than suspecting you of cheating every moment she doesn’t have eyes on you.
Sure, then maybe enable it before those rides and disable afterward, and send her a text when you’d like her to keep an eye on it.
Keeping it on all the time has tons of potential privacy-related problems since phones a aren’t perfect.
Meh. My location sharing makes no difference to who I DONT want to see my location, your always being watched if u have a smart phone anyways 🤷 turning it on and off is too much effort to be bothered, I got nothing to hide from her.
This. If your partner is jealous, you’re not the problem. If they can’t work through it with you, walk.
People with trust issues are exhausting. Make sure they’re worth it without losing yourself.
Signed, Experienced
My SO gets super jealous/anxious, probably because of all the horror stories in the news. Having access to my location would only make that worse, because then every time I drop a coworker off at home or something and forget to tell my SO, they’ll get super suspicious.
I’d much rather work off trust than need to explain every little deviation from my normal schedule just to avoid some anxiety.
Me and my partner share locations. Never once have we done this. It’s purely a logistical thing. 10x faster to check someone’s location when you’re supposed to meet them instead of testing them “wya”.
Yeah, exactly. So great to be able to say, oh, she’s about 15 minutes away, so I’ll start making dinner. Much easier and safer than texting while driving, too.
We originally set it up so she could make sure I wasn’t laying in a ditch somewhere from a cycling crash.
Same. For this to be a problem, you must first have other problems.
How old are you guys, if you don’t mind me asking? It seems that generally younger people don’t see this as an innate violation of privacy, where older people feel quite surveilled and even like they’re being viewed as untrustworthy for someone to ask this of them.
I’ve never cheated on my spouse (not even close), I’ve never felt any inclination to lie about my whereabouts. I can see the safety aspect of this, logically. I would feel offended if my spouse asked me to be a dot on his phone, as if he was asking to own me. We share a home, a child, a bank account, a car, but we don’t share location. I don’t even keep my location activated for my own use unless I’m actively navigating somewhere new.
We’ve got plenty of “normal” problems, but none of them lead me to want his location. I simply trust him enough. It feels to me like if you need your partners location on tap, you must first have other problems
I’m 37 and share my location with my wife. We have kids. It is an efficiency thing that we use to help decide when to begin dinner, who’s grabbing the kids, etc. The whole idea of trust issues is just very high school to me.
I have my mom’s location. She lives alone. She works in the city. Sometimes I like to just be sure she got home but don’t need to bother her about it, or I’m at work late and can’t be making phone calls.
Folks with privacy concerns, I guess I accept that. But if you think the only thing stopping the government from snatching you is your location services being off, you’re sorely mistaken.
I’d rather not disclose my age on this account, but, let’s just say we’re not newly married.
I will admit my statement about location sharing only being a problem if you’ve already got problems was a bit too binary. The issue is more nuanced.
I see you’re focusing on the cheating aspect, which to your credit is what the OP is all about. But from our perspective, that’s not even an issue or a use case for the technology. We have full trust in each other. The technology is simply useful for other reasons.
Did she make it to work in the snowstorm or rainstorm?
Huh she’s usually home by now, is she unconscious in a ditch or just stopped at the store?
Dinner is almost ready, I just need to put this in the oven so it’s ready to come out the second she walks in the door, let me make sure she’s actually on her way home. Oh, she must have gotten held up at work, I’ll wait a few more minutes.
Stuff like that. Yeah there’s other ways of solving those problems, and that’s fine too, we just prefer the convenience.
We don’t share locations because we don’t trust each other, we share because it’s convenient. I guess you could say we trust each other not to go crazy with it 🤷♂️
We have married friends who won’t share with each other, and that’s fine too.
I’ll retract my earlier statement. Location sharing is a sensitive subject, with lots of facets. Sharing or not is a personal choice. And while there can be practical benefits, I think most people would agree that using it for cheating prevention is… Unhealthy.
I’m 40 and have done this with partners.
But also, they and I have an open relationship. If they found me in the bed of another, the reaction would an excited inquiry of if I had fun.
I don’t mind my girlfriend knowing where I am because I’m not cheating on her. The only time it gets a bit weird is if me and my mates are doing something a bit stupid, one time we went to one of those trampoline centres at like 10:00 p.m. because they were having an adult night. We pushed to get massively over excited about trampolines and I ended up getting questioned about it in the morning. But hey she definitely knew I wasn’t cheating on her there she just thought I was being weird
Same. I don’t even recall setting it up until I stumbled on it one day and could track my wife. I pulled a few pranks until I revealed my hand but we’ve never turned it off. There’s nothing malicious about it and we’re both happy to keep it on.
It’s also really great when someone is driving to pick you up. You can see how far out they are, and be ready when they arrive.
This is a huge no from me. My SO doesn’t need my location, and sharing it has a lot of potential downsides, like:
- phone manufacturer selling it to advertisers
- gov’t getting it and I accidentally trust trigger some alarm
- data getting exposed in a breach
- apps without location access getting it through some means
There’s a lot of potential downside and the upside is… my SO knows when I’m almost home?
Yeah, no. Maybe I’ll share if I’m doing something risky like hiking alone, but that’s never staying on constantly.
Call me old school but I just text my SO when I am almost home.
My route has pretty much no stoplights, so there’s not really an opportunity to text. But I send a text when I leave and if I’m delayed (i.e. I’ll have an opportunity to text).
It works well.
I don’t agree with the practice but I do see the point - it reduces anxiety and gives your partner a sense that you’re okay for relationships where trust is strong. For toxic relationships this should absolutely not be a thing.
As far as governments or companies selling the data… You can use some self-hosted services on a de-googled GrapheneOS or LineageOS install and use sattelite location only. Then, pipe that to said self hosted solution that doesn’t sell your data like homeassistant or whatever.
Idk, I think it would increase anxiety for my SO, and we have a lot of trust. For example, if I take a coworker home, go out to lunch, etc w/o telling my SO, and they see that deviation in my routine, they could start doubting that trust. But if they just don’t see it, they just rely on what we tell each other, and if it’s not important, it doesn’t need to be communicated and can’t create that anxiety.
At least that’s my take. My SO is really trusting, but also quite anxious because of nonsense they read on SM and whatnot, so a deviation can create a lot of unnecessary concern.
But yeah, I wouldn’t be completely opposed to a self-hosted solution here. I use GrapheneOS, and if the UX isn’t too terrible (i.e. easy to toggle off and on), it could be really useful for something like going hiking alone or whatever.
if I take a coworker home, go out to lunch, etc w/o telling my SO, and they see that deviation in my routine, they could start doubting that trust
This means there are still significant insecurities in the relationship that can bubble up and become problems, and you know about these.
You do not trust your spouse to trust you and not misinterpret your intentions.
Paradoxally You can defeat some of this insecurity by being transparent and welcoming misinterpretation if you believe you both have full trust in each other.
As a high anxiety person myself, this works to defeat the anxiety which is often feared of the unknown. By proving that deviations to your routine are not something they should feel anxious about, then that anxiety can melt away.
It honestly hasn’t been a big problem, but my SO for some reason invents a bunch of unlikely stuff they have to consciously ignore.
Do whatever works though.
After 30 years of marriage, my wife floated the idea of turning this on. I looked at her like she had two heads.
Why would anyone be willfully surveilled? You know its not just your partner that has access to that data when you have location services enabled.
lol do you think your phone isn’t normally recording your your location data even without this feature turned on?
lol Do you think its not made worse by turning it on?
Made worse, like they had the info before but now they really have it? They always have it, that’s it. If you’re concerned about privacy drop the phone, otherwise it’s a bullshit argument.
You think the toggle literally does nothing? That’s insane. Third parties don’t exist? Extra surveillance doesnt exist? You are fucking ignorant.
Found Hank Hill’s neighbor, Dale.
That’s creepy af
Starting this by saying: Using tracking apps to see what someone’s doing 24/7 or worrying about them cheating is insane and is a solid NO, full stop.
But I do understand why people use tracking apps, and I wish we had good FOSS alternatives. A tracking/location sharing app where the trackee can turn it on/off anytime they want (after using a password/biometrics, to prevent others from messing with it), so loved ones can be sure you made it to your destination.
I don’t want people stalking their kids, judging their friends for the places they go, surveiling if someone’s a cheater, or worst of all, having their data be sold by the shitty companies that run these services.
I’ve read stories that have scared me and made me wish I could do something like that when I’m out late. I had to (unfortunately) use Live360 during a field trip in another country cause the teachers needed to keep track of us. I understand safety-wise that these apps are vital
I wish there was one that didn’t require nearly every phone permission all the time.
I’ve setup Hauk for my dad to broadcast his location while delivering. It is only activated when he activates it, but it also works if you want to share location with a specific group of people. It has an app and a website, and can be password protected. It also records history and speed, but history can be turned off.
It is not very robust or particularly well coded, but it is a nice little FOSS app that works, but has to be self hosted.
