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NegativeNull@lemmy.worldM to TenForward: Where Every Vulcan Knows Your Name@lemmy.world · 6 months ago

Ass Detection: Peak 24th century technology

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Ass Detection: Peak 24th century technology

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NegativeNull@lemmy.worldM to TenForward: Where Every Vulcan Knows Your Name@lemmy.world · 6 months ago
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  • caboose2006@lemmy.ca
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    6 months ago

    Apparently Johnathan Frakes had hip issues which is why Riker stepped over chairs and he was always leaning on things.

    Edit: video for the uninitiated.

    • darkpanda@lemmy.ca
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      6 months ago

      Plus it’s a totally alpha move. BDE (big dilithium energy) move if I ever saw one.

    • RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      Plus he’s fucking tall.

      • RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        Only 6’3".

        • AlligatorBlizzard@sh.itjust.works
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          6 months ago

          He’s fucking tall.

          Source: 5’4".

        • RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          Sam Winchester is 6’3" and everyone calls him a giant.

    • NotMyOldRedditName@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      I’ve seen it all, yet never seen that. wow.

  • Thebeardedsinglemalt@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    They’d likely have similar technology with their touchscreens as well do ours. It’s not meant to react against any pressure, but only recognizes conductive material.

    And Starfleet would make sure NOT to have the ass of their uniforms made of that kind of material for these exact reasons

  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    And yet a touchscreen that doesn’t explode is still beyond all of their technology.

    • The Giant Korean@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      Do you want explosion free screens, or screens you can sit on? You can’t have it both ways.

    • Miles O'Brien@startrek.website
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      6 months ago

      Look, there’s a reason you can wire almost any heavy machinery into any random console or wall panel… When you run this much power to every station, exploding panels are gonna happen.

      It’s either that, or we run our ships like Vulcans, and that’s just boring.

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        Username checks out.

    • T156@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      That’s what happens when your computer designers seem to have a microtape loose, and decide that connecting the multi-exawatt power system directly to all the powered systems is a good idea.

      Prssumably the same people who build a malevolent AI that takes over the ship every few decades, or makes it so that starships explode if they bonk into anything hard enough.

  • charmed_electron@programming.dev
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    6 months ago

    I think this was addressed explicitly on TNG even! IIRC there was an episode where a kid has ptsd thinking he caused his ship to wreck. It comes out that while the ship was shaking he pressed his forearm up against the panel for balance. One of the enterprise crew tells him at the climax he couldn’t have messed anything up because he’s not crew or something

    • surph_ninja@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      And the designers of LCARS informed the cast that any button they pressed was the correct button, because the system was smart enough to present a custom smart interface that was intuitive to the crew member using it. Presumably, it’s also smart enough to recognize Riker’s ass.

      • JcbAzPx@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        Oh, it is very familiar with Riker’s ass.

        • surph_ninja@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          Same.

          • LousyCornMuffins@lemmy.world
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            6 months ago

            Us and half the alpha quadrant

      • Inucune@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        The idea that the computer can tell who is interacting with the panel, authenticate them, and distinguish a command from something set/leaning on it makes sense. Riker is trusting that system. They could have made a throwaway joke about Riker breaking a prototype replacement in testing when he leaned on it.

  • aeronmelon@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    Data: “Commander, you just vaporized the Vulcan supply convoy.”

  • SlopppyEngineer@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    My phone already knows the difference between handpalm and fingertips, so that’s already covered.

    Although I once saw a guy shutdown a factory by sitting in the edge of a desk and they mouse that was lying there. He managed to use his behind to click shutdown and press ok on the confirmation screen. Even the most improbable will happen one day.

    • MutilationWave@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      I was at a party in a small apartment many years ago. I was leaning against the oven/range with my ass while hanging out in the kitchen. I managed to turn on one of the back burners high enough that it set a box of teabags on fire. We were so damn confused for a little bit.

  • grue@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    They have psychic doors, so ass detection should be a piece of cake.

    • jrs100000@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      And prescient com badges.

      Edit: Im sure the com badges can also recognize Rikers ass.

  • Hobbes_Dent@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    Everyone be checking out Riker.

    I count three.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      Riker’s best day ever:

      He fucked every one of the other Rikers. Every single one.

      Even this guy.

      Especially that guy.

      • Hobbes_Dent@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        I was actually gonna post “four” (people checking him out).

        I was number three.

        • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          Ohhhh! Yeah, definitely four then.

        • RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          Five. You forgot Billy-boy himself.

  • kboy101222@sh.itjust.works
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    6 months ago

    Wait, is that Beverly in an engineering uniform?

    • NegativeNull@lemmy.worldOPM
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      6 months ago

      I was thinking she looks like Bryce Dallas Howard

      • kboy101222@sh.itjust.works
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        6 months ago

        Ah, yeah, it probably is!

        • NegativeNull@lemmy.worldOPM
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          She would have been around 8ish years old, so it’s not her, but looks a lot like her.

          • kboy101222@sh.itjust.works
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            6 months ago

            Ope. Had no idea who that was! Any idea why Beverly is in yellow?

            • klemptor@startrek.website
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              6 months ago

              That’s not Crusher, it’s probably Diana Giddings.

              • Thebeardedsinglemalt@lemmy.world
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                6 months ago

                It’s not Diana Giddings either, there was a whole debate on this very scene within the last few days. That’s ensign Kellogg played by regular stand-in Cameron

                • klemptor@startrek.website
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                  6 months ago

                  Oh wow - thanks!

              • kboy101222@sh.itjust.works
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                6 months ago

                Ah, good to know!

    • Boddhisatva@lemmy.world
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      I’m pretty sure that is Patricia Tallman. She appeared on a number of Star Trek shows. She also played Lyta Alexander on Babylon5.

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