Is radical a bad word? Its use is generally associated with revolutionary politics. The usage of the term by TERFs stems from second wave feminist theory. They have to specify that they are Trans Exclusionary to distinguish them from radical feminists as a whole, who are not necessarily Trans exclusionary.

Its working, horrifyingly. In several communities lately ive seen moderators start to treat violent racism and antisemitism as personal beliefs that do not on their own necessitate banning. This in private progressive leaning communities too. Eugencist christian white nationalism is becoming a normal tolerated ideology to have.

Instagram is especially bad too. I see a lot of people talking about Twitter, but not enough about Instagram.

Ive had incredible luck thrifting. I usually go once every 2 weeks and only take items I really like. Early on I stuck to sports bras cause theyre more forgiving as you grow, so they last a bit longer.

A line silhouettes tend to look good when your hips aren’t super wide, as your fat moves around tho your hips will fill out. More than anything have fun with it. Try new clothes outside your comfort zone. Get lots of accessories too!! Putting together an outfit with accessories is so much fun. Gives you the opportunity to further express yourself 😊

Not OP, but i can say 2 years post op it feels weird to think I used to have something there lol

Congratulations Dandelion, so happy for you 😊

If by personal and intimate you meant about bodies or relationships or surgeries or sex or, I mean really anything related to being transfeminine then yeah you can absolutely discuss those things here. Adult content should be labeled as NSFW, the usage of slurs in titles should be avoided, but as long as the rules are being followed thats all that matters.

I also experienced extreme bottom dysphoria. It was completely disruptive my whole life. It definitely got worse the longer I was out as trans. There were so many things I wanted to do that I didnt feel like I could. I’m very inclined towards feminine clothes and presentation and I pretty much never could wear anything explicitly fem. I always wore baggy clothes, hoodies and jeans in the middle of summer kinda vibe. It was awful genuinely I hated my body and wanted no one to ever see me. I didnt swim for over a decade. I felt out of place among other women, I felt repulsed with intimacy and avoided it as much as possible. I got misgendered a lot and just sort of accepted it. I was very unhappy most of the time.

I dont have any easy answers. It nearly killed me. I coped badly, to make a long story short. I waited a long time for surgery and getting it saved my life. Its been over 2 years now. I’m almost an entirely different person. Its hard to really summarize all the changes but I actually like who I am today. I love my body in spite of its flaws and I actually feel free to be myself, something I never did before. I’m better adjusted emotionally and much better at managing my mental health. I’m not entirely free of dysphoria now, but bottom dysphoria was far and away the worst for me.

The next 6 months before your surgery date will feel like the longest thing ever and also retrospectively like the blink of an eye. A light at the end of the tunnel exists. I’m very excited for you to get there. Be patient with yourself and focus on getting through each day.

They openly deride empathy itself. They only use this language to fuel the media cycle and keep their rabid indoctrinated followers occupied. Its all misdirection. They are hellbent on carrying out their eugenicist fantasies and inevitably they will try to do so.

I wonder how far away we are from bans on hiring racial minorities, women and queer people. Some of the first acts against minorities the Nazis carried out were bans on working for the government and bans on working in education. Eventually the Trumpists will get to that point. Fascists are neither creative nor original. We know what they want and we know what they’re going to do, it’s all a matter of timing now.

It looks about the same as any vagina really. I do have a clitoral hood, but I prefer stimulation over it rather than direct stimulation personally. It can also be stimulated somewhat from the inside.

It feels also about the same as any other vagina lol. Like it’s kinda hard to get much of a specific texture profile from it tbh. Fleshy I suppose.

I had penile inversion vaginoplasty and I self lubricate. My surgeon preserves the bulbourethral glands during the surgery for this reason. Those are the parts that create pre-ejaculate. Which are homologous to the Bartholin’s glands, which help lubricate the vagina for cis women. So yeah if things are heated I do get wet lol.

Having one is pretty normal at this point 2 years post op. It was overall probably the single most incredible event of my entire life and my whole life changed a lot after. I used to suffer a lot from bottom dysphoria. To the point that I struggled to function a lot of the time. Getting surgery was the best choice I’ve ever made for myself and yeah I am extremely happy with the outcome.

Hm. You should bring a lot of comfortable clothes. I honestly kinda wish I had cut my hair before surgery, cause you end up spending a lot of time fairly low energy and in bed. My hair ended up getting super tangled as a result. If youre diligent you could braid it frequently or just get someone else to brush it, but I had like 3 foot long hair so I was not capable of managing it on my own lol. Bring hand and lip cream, hospital/clinic air can be super dry. Bring some stuff to keep you occupied ofc, game consoles or books or shows. The clinic i went to had us all in dorms so I brought headphones to be polite to everyone else staying at the time.

Before hand, I mean for me it was winding off of smoking (almost 2 years since i quit) and trying to get into a healthier eating routine. Cutting back on caffeine and stocking up on low effort meal supplies. Trying to keep calm. Things go very fast once youre there but the build up can be nerve wracking.

After hand, while youre in the hospital they will be instructing you on every little thing. They won’t force you to walk, or at least my clinic only forced me to do it on day 1. But I kept walking every day, usually twice a day for 15 minutes each. Its good to keep yourself moving but also not overdo it.

Once you’re back home do not try to get back into your normal routine. You are off your feet and your are in recovery and you will need help. Crucial that during the first 2 months you spend as much putting minimal strain on your body. You’ll sleep a lot. Get a in bed laptop/meal tray. It will come in handy, or at least it did for me. Download a timers app on your phone early on for timing dilation, pain killers, walks, etc. The first few months feel like forever at first but it goes pretty fast. When you get first home though yeah you really want to rest as much as possible, get lots of fluids and focus on adhering to the routine your surgeon tells you to do.

The healthcare system in North America actively works against us in every possible way. You are your only advocate. If you dont speak up for yourself your needs will fall on deaf ears.

Yeah I just about had a meltdown trying to disable all the AI collection that Samsung phones come with nowadays. Phones are more like data harvesting engines than devices of utility. It’s gotten so much worse over the past 5 years. I mean it was never good but it’s making the internet nearly unusable if you want any kind of privacy.

From one neurodivergent woman to another, be aware that ableism exists everywhere. Finding other neuroqueer people was the first time in my life I really felt like I belonged somewhere.

I’m also a lesbian. It did take me a long time to come around to that though. Had less to do with my body and more with my confusion surrounding the way men affirming me made me feel. Straight men finding me desirable validated my identity. I confused the euphoria of that validation with attraction. I transitioned almost a decade ago and do not see a male body though, so not exactly what I think you’re referring to.

TikTok absolutely does the same kind of thing and worse. Engagement is all that matters. Doesn’t matter what kind, what about, or how that engagement is generated.

My family is from nearby. Unironically hundreds of icebergs a year pass that area. It was honestly a matter of time.

First of all, you are absolutely welcome to be vulnerable and in pain in this community. This space belongs to you girl and you are allowed to struggle and vent about what you’re going through. You don’t have to justify needing support, and this community was made for you.

You are a woman. It’s not dependent on you meeting certain criteria or appearing a certain way or presenting a certain face. It’s you. You’re a mom too, and that pressure is a lot on your shoulders as well. You can only take things one day at a time. Spending time with chasers was definitely a mistake I made in the past. It feels incredibly dehumanizing because it is. It’s being reduced down to body parts and consumed by others. I struggled with severe dysphoria and depression for years, I know it’s hard. Reaching out like this was a step you made for yourself. That’s a step you should recognize. Community is important for trans folks. It can be so isolating without others who understand what you’re going through. You’re not alone. I hope today at least is a bit easier.

You’re good :) I agree with your advice as well. For trans people, there’s a lot to consider, like whether they will be accepting of our transition. I live far away from where I lived pre transition so it doesn’t come up a lot for me, but it’s a measured decision whenever situations come up.

I like that you repeated that 3 times for emphasis. Yeah they’re a bunch of sociopathic sex pests.

I said this in another comment, but it is not possible to know who is and isn’t faking it. You can’t diagnose someone over the internet. You just can’t. A proper assessment is done in a clinical setting over a period of time. If we normalize questioning the diagnosis of others inevitably a sizable amount of people accused of faking it will genuinely be neurodivergent. Same goes with being queer. It benefits no one to allow others to decide if someone is gay or trans or not. All that it does is normalize the idea that it’s acceptable or permissible for other people to decide who you are for you.

I resolutely oppose any efforts to label others as faking a disorder. Genuinely. I do not believe in the “watering down the meaning” theory and believe that ableism/queerphobia comes explicitly from hatred and disgust, not from any experiences with real or fake neurodivergent/queer people. Far, far more harm is done by gatekeeping our community.

You remember that guy who pretended to be a trans woman a while ago? Like had socials and did this whole thing for months? If he came out as trans again today I have no reason not to accept him. So what if he is faking? If he exhibits predatory behavior then he should be excluded by those behaviors. I have no reason to question his identity though. It doesn’t benefit me or my community in any way to treat gender as anything other than what someone self identifies.

Much the same with neurodivergency. Unironically millions of neurodivergent people, predominantly women, have never gotten any help whatsoever for their neurodivergency because they have been systematically gatekept from getting a diagnosis by others who do not believe them. It benefits no one to normalize gatekeeping.