The United States of Whatever
Wendigo
It’s an Algonquin cryptid / monster with an insatiable hunger for human flesh and a love of murder. Generally greedy and evil. Also known to smell bad.
Honors our native heritage and says something about our beloved country’s strength of character.
Wackoland
The United States Inc. since that’s all we are anyway…
United Corp.
Whatever the Cherokee word for “stolen land” is.
Truly the English specialty: stealing stuff from other people.
What’s the only reason the pyramids are still in Egypt? They’re too big to fit in the British museum.
Too big to fit English ships you mean ;)
TwatWaffle McDunceland
Muskland. Quickly so we can start a fight.
OK hear me out: It should be named after the first European explorer to discover it and popularize the European expansion: Christopher Columbus.
- Like its namesake, the nation too is racist, cruel and genocidal. Even the Spanish Inquisition era Catholics were like, damn Christopher!
- Like the largest exporter of cocaíne in South America, it too is full of drugs, and its elections are the plaything of big money cartels and foreign powers.
- It was mostly settled by white people from England.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give to you your new nation: British Columbia.
Hank D. Hamburgers Electric Freedom Gun-Republic
Republucllc
The Adjacent States of Denial
Staties McStatyface
Oooh a contest to name the country, most votes wins!
I’ll set up the 1-900 number, just $10 to submit your vote.
Turtle Island
Hey now, I’m feeling attacked!
Listen. I know you said no wrong answers but unfortunately due to the past few decades of the American Political system, pretty much anything is now effectively accurate. Even such things as:
- The Divided States of America
- McMilitary Industrial Complex
- The Paycheck-to-Paycheck Republic
- Red vs Blue
- Gilded Ruins
- AmeriKKKa
- Walmartistan
- Gunlandia
- Yeehaw Reich
- Methlehem
- Debtlandia
- Live, Laugh, Lawsuit
Trade names with the Gulf and become the United States of Mexico.
There’s nothing united about it, other than maybe hatred towards minorities
New New Mexico and Old New Mexico
United mcstatesface
