Oh I thought this was another article about that big orange crybaby in Moronica.
Frozen in 1994? Surprised the headline wasn’t: “Millennials are Getting Born Later Than Any Generation in History”
I thought the world’s oldest baby was elected president?
Why, yes, he was
Instead, she opted for “embryo adoption”, which allowed her to have a say in the future parents - with the process overseen by a religious agency.
Nightlight Christian Adoptions took on the embryos and placed them with Lindsey and Tim Pierce.
They fitted Linda’s criteria of a married, Caucasian Christian couple…
How lovely
Buying frozen babies, just as God intended.
Frozen can be fresher than “fresh” because it’s frozen at the optimal freshness rather than picked early and shipped, sitting on shelves for six months.
It’s also less expensive than using fresh babies for the blood sacrifice.
Yeah but you ever try to stab a frozen baby with a ritual knife? Such a pain.
Would you prefer they not make this logical compromise between their faith and people’s needs?
Whose needs?
So by Republican logic that baby can vote
This is actually a genius question. Technically would that mean that a premature baby would have to wait an extra few months after their birthday?
Nope. Of course not. Your age is a function of your birthdate. you’re not a person before then.
I know what I said.
Baby in 2040 at age 15. “You mean I could have been born in 1995!? I could have at least enjoyed some of the early 2000s!
- The peak of our civilization.
Too bad those sliding phones never really caught on
They were actually produced and sold, but apparently the sliding mechanism would break with wear and tear.
There’s a lot of heavy lifting by a lot of words in there. Saying the baby has a “biological sister” is at best a half truth and more like a total falsehood. I have a half sister out there somewhere that was adopted away that I’ve never met. And that’s far more close than this scenario.
Frozen embryo. Meh.
I thought this was about extended gestation at first, which is something I’ve always wondered about: is the whole 9-months thing driven by the baby or the mother? Or more specifically, is 9 months the optimal amount of time for a baby to be in the womb?
Like if we manipulated the hormones / blocked the whole pressure-oxytocin feedback loop on the maternal side to just keep the mother gestating for… 12 months? 15? 3 years?? Would the ‘newborn toddler’ have a hyper-developed brain? Or just a normal brain that lost out on the first 3 years of critical life experience?
If our incubation tech was good enough to fully replace a biological mother… 20 years? …there’s a dystopian sci-fi writing prompt for ya. …or like, the key to super humans.
Or, would shit like the foramen ovale on the fetal side of things just close off anyway and put it into a birth-now-or-die situation?
This headline is absolutely perfect for this community.
That’s weird, I watched Children of Men last night
They’ll do anything to not take care of the kids already here that need parents and support.
